Question existing.....
My biggest fear in life is and has always been ending up in Hell and burning for all of eternity.
The concept of it all scares me to death.
However this also has filled me with permanent guilt. Doing things that are said to be sinful and self serving and self enriching will lead me to the pits of this Hell.
Now life on the other hand is a contradiction, good people suffer all the time. The selfish and cruel achieve things and prosper because they don't care about anybody either than themselves.
Seeing such then leaves a person with burning questions, how is this possible? How is that they seem to prosper as rotten as they are?
It's all just really confusing, I wouldn't call myself a saint but I know that I would never intentionally harm a person, and I'm always more than willing to take a backseat and let whomever have whatever they feel they deserve more than I do. However being that person has now left me hollow, robbed , cheated and betrayed. .. not by people but by myself.
I always ask myself, why do I still fear Hell when I've been living In my own personal Hell? It may not be as bad as the person who right this moment has no idea what they will eat for supper, or the person who's unfaithful partner intentionally infected them with HIV, may not be as bad as the person who is dealing with the loss of a loved one and has been losing loved ones every year....but it is my own personal Hell none the less.
The question still exists, and I have yet to find the answer.... why is it that good people suffer?
Some may argue and say well, how about you be selfish and evil for a change, and my response would be it is not it my nature, unfortunately God made me as I am, and try as I might but I lose sleep if I know that I offended somebody during the day, I wake up and try to make amends. I don't take pleasure in hurting people or being overly ambitious at the expense of another.
If it has to come because of someone's tears then I don't want it, because I know what that pain is like thus I choose to not inflict it on somebody else.
But the question still exists.... why is it that good people suffer?.....
The concept of it all scares me to death.
However this also has filled me with permanent guilt. Doing things that are said to be sinful and self serving and self enriching will lead me to the pits of this Hell.
Now life on the other hand is a contradiction, good people suffer all the time. The selfish and cruel achieve things and prosper because they don't care about anybody either than themselves.
Seeing such then leaves a person with burning questions, how is this possible? How is that they seem to prosper as rotten as they are?
It's all just really confusing, I wouldn't call myself a saint but I know that I would never intentionally harm a person, and I'm always more than willing to take a backseat and let whomever have whatever they feel they deserve more than I do. However being that person has now left me hollow, robbed , cheated and betrayed. .. not by people but by myself.
I always ask myself, why do I still fear Hell when I've been living In my own personal Hell? It may not be as bad as the person who right this moment has no idea what they will eat for supper, or the person who's unfaithful partner intentionally infected them with HIV, may not be as bad as the person who is dealing with the loss of a loved one and has been losing loved ones every year....but it is my own personal Hell none the less.
The question still exists, and I have yet to find the answer.... why is it that good people suffer?
Some may argue and say well, how about you be selfish and evil for a change, and my response would be it is not it my nature, unfortunately God made me as I am, and try as I might but I lose sleep if I know that I offended somebody during the day, I wake up and try to make amends. I don't take pleasure in hurting people or being overly ambitious at the expense of another.
If it has to come because of someone's tears then I don't want it, because I know what that pain is like thus I choose to not inflict it on somebody else.
But the question still exists.... why is it that good people suffer?.....
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